What is your purpose in life and how you can relate it a little to the "Law of Diminishing Returns"

I’ll start this blog with an anecodete from my experience that I will recall later in the blog.

Back in 2013, when I was single mindedly focussed on cracking CAT/XAT alongside my job, I remember meeting a batchmate of mine occasionally during various GDPI prep sessions. Unlike a 7 pointer 88%er like me, she was a perennial topper who got calls from all the IIMs. And unlike me, she wasn’t single mindedly focussed on cracking CAT/B-schools. I was in self pity mode and rued that I didnt get calls from IIM-A, IIM-B despite a 99.73%tile and told her how awesome it was that she got calls from them all. Her shrugged and replied a litle dismissively “Aye, it sucks being a topper man”.
At what moment I got dumb struck and replied incredulously “What hypocrisy” and I didn’t get the real meaning behind her reply at all back then.

Growing up, you keep having things to chase on after another - good marks, good colleges, good first job, good b school/masters/, finding a lucractive career path, finding your partner etc. I grew up in the middle of a big city in crowds and noise and amidst a lot of energy. To put in in economic terms, there was enough to look forward to and target in life that the Law of Diminishing Margins didnt really apply - it was always a “productive phase”.

I grew up with limited but comfortable enough access to things that kids want. I didnt get to buy Harry Potter books (unlike my friends) when they released and had to either get a pirated e-copy or borrow it later from someone. I didn’t get to go on flights or even 3 tier AC till I was 23. I didnt eat all the fancy junky foods and treats that I wanted. I didnt get to buy a PS2, I got access to internet only in class 10. I told myself “One day when I earn money, I’ll buy all of these!”

However, now that I AM earning reasonable money and can (largely) buy what I want - any treats, holidays, any consumer goods and electronics, etc. But the Law of Diminishing Margins kicked in and HOW. Given this limited satisfaction that I now got from material purchases/experiences and given how I could literally feel how my body could not take the wear and tear like before, I felt a little hollow and that is when I started my journey of “what are the things that I NOW want that can again beat the Law of Diminishing Returns and get me back to the productive stage”? i.e - what are the things that will keep me going for life?

What are the some of the common things that keep people going?

1. Fast career growth

2. Monetory success/successfull ventures and businesses

3. A happy family/good marriage

4. Great relationship and friends

5. Material pursuits like wanting to buy a houses, a dream car, covering your dream destinations etc

So when people (including in interviews) ask me “Tujhe kya karna hai” or “what is your goal in life” - I may reply with something then but the reality is that I genuinely dont know.

While I’m fairly competitive and feel some level of satisaction when I prove to myself that I am better than my peers, I dont see a fast career growth (i.e. - becoming a CEO/CFO etc) something that drives me. I have increasingly felt that the world is addicted to constant economic growth which is 1. destroying the planet even faster 2. is not something that can last forever. A book that I would strongly recommend around this is Amitav Ghosh’s "The Nutmegs Curse - Parables for a Planet in Crisis”

I’ll not claim stupid things that money is not important (it is) but targeting a salary of X lakhs just doesnt give me that kick. One of the drawbacks of going to a b-school is how you constantly compare your successes and failures to that of your batchmates- even 10-15 years after your graduate - you dont really compare yourself to say a founder of a unicorn or an influencer with 20 million followers. I have come to realize this fallacy off late and have tried turning a blind eye to this.

Coming back to the fast big city life, I have grown up in a city that has only exploded 3x in this time and has changed substantially. Life is a lot faster now, there is far far more traffic, there are too many people, too many vehicles, too many commercial places and and too much noise. My body cant take the traffic, the hustle and bustle and the noise like it did when I was growing up.

I now admire and respect the basics (rather than material goals alone) far more - greenery, good relationships, quiet, solitude, nature, good health and etc.

Things that I took for granted when I grew up mean far more to me now:

1. Standing at the door of a train and watching it curve and stare at the green rural countryside for hours

   

2. Spend more time in greenery and nature and find solace in the waves of the ocean and of the vastness of the mountains

   

   

3. Getting lost (almost literally) and being more disconnected at times

   

4. Look at routines and habits with positive tinted glasses rather than rebel against conformity

5. Eating a balanced diet and taking care of your self for the long term

6. Not feeling a constant sense of FOMO that always loomed over you when you grew up

7. Be kind to people, make them feel good and try being a likeable person rather than an arrogant know-it-all.

and so so many more things.

I have spend a considerable amount of time in tier 2 cities like Mangalore, Jamshedpur and Udaipur. I admire the slower life in these places far more than the hustle of Mumbai and Bangalore - which is something I could NEVER imagine 10-15 years ago. I was always a big city kid - it was a part of my identity and my pride. But spending time in these cities, or being super impressed by the infrastructure in cities like Trivandrum or Ahmedabad or Indore - has changed my world view.

So I’ll recall that little story about my topper friend that I started this blog with. I now understand why she said “It sucks being a topper” - it is difficult to let go of something that had been your identity (in this case - being a topper). You believe you have too much to lose if you slip up.

Similarly, as much I would want to move to these smaller cities, live in quietude and less crowded places - I believe that, despite the back breaking (literally) traffic, the increasing amount of chaos and stupidity, I have too much to lose if I do that - career opportunities, income, familiarity and the social circles aroud me.

That is why taking a plunge into entrepreneurship is something I now increasingly admire - especially by those who “have a lot to lose”.

Maybe, I’ll too take these plunges someday. Maybe I will reach an inflexion point where I will feel that what I am doing is giving me far too diminished returns.

Coming back to purpose in life - your purpose in life can be any of the above or something else - its completely on what really pushes you and keeps you going. I will not belittle anyone who is open about wanting to earn a lot despite not relating much to it. I will admire anyone who says its my goal to become a CEO or a hi-fi investment banker and is selfish about it. If constantly comparing yourself to your peers motivates you, so be it- I may no agree with it but again, I will not belittle it.

To me, I’m still in the journey of discovering what gives me meaning and I am pursuing it furiously.

But maybe, just maybe - is this journey of self-discovery in itself a worthy meaning? It may entail pushing yourself in any way, constantly challenging yourself, having many good relationships, being better with people and understanding human behaviour better, having many mini-goals to pursue, pushing yourself outside your comfort zone always or getting a multitude of experiences.

Take a minute or more and ask youself - what is it that truly intrisicially drives you and gives you some meaning?